Spanking: A Hot Topic about Corporal Punishment.

Christi has sparked my interested with a recent post about the pros and cons on the use of spanking as a form of discipline for a child. I thought I would elaborate on my thoughts here at my blog on the subject.

I am a firm believer that spanking is NOT a necessary form of discipline or punishment for a child.

I could never advocate or encourage any form of discipline that requires physical force, as I believe there are more effective forms of discipline.

That being said, I understand that spanking your child is a choice many parents choose, and I think the critical issue here isn’t whether corporal punishment is a widely preferred form of disciple in many countries around world; but rather HOW corporal punishment is administered.

Although I do not endorse or believe in spanking, I do acknowledge that it is a choice. Spanking shouldn’t be a form of humiliation or embarrassment. If one chooses to spank, I think the following rules should apply to ensure love and understanding are a continually being fostered within your child.

1. Spanking should never be administered on a whim or impulse when the parent is angry. Motivations for any form of discipline should be out of love for the purpose of teaching and correction, never for revenge or to inflict pain.

2. If spanking as a form of discipline is ineffective, other appropriate responses need to be identified to correct the behaviour. Parents should never increase the intensity of a spanking or try to measure the intensity of the spanking based on the child’s wrong doing.

3.Spanking should never cause bruising or cause physical injury.

4. Spanking should always be a planned action (not an angry reaction). The spanking should never cause humiliation or belittlement of the child (i.e. not administered in public).

5. Before punishment, calmly review the offence with the child and the desired behaviour or outcome to reinforce understanding.

6. The rules of the home need to be made clear. Punishment should not be given if none of these rules were broken. It is not fair to punish a child for something they did not know was wrong.

There have been some interesting discussions around spanking and its use in the bible. The phrase “spare the rod and spoil the child” as a form of corporal punishment is strongly recommended in the Old Testament. Most bible quotations that advocate spanking appear in the book or Proverbs.

Most religious conservative believe that the book of Proverbs was assembled by King Solomon and the passages that deal with spanking are thought to reflect his parenting beliefs around his son, Rehoboam. The bible itself records the negative effect that Solomon’s parenting style had on his son. When his son became ruler after his death, he was widely hated and even had run away to Jerusalem to avoid being assassinated by his own people.

What I understand from the bibles message is that if you don’t want your children to grow up like Rehoboam, then you should NOT follow Solomon’s parenting style as it was depicted in the bible.

Others would argue, I’m sure, that Solomon’s parenting recommendations reflect God’s expectations, and therefore, using spanking as a form of disciple in acceptable.

To each their own, I’m just trying to provide both sides of the King Solomon story.

Not everyone will take the same approach to parenting, and that is ok, because what works for one won’t work for everyone. Most of us are well intentioned humans, and I’m sure no matter what form of discipline you choose, as long as you have the best of intentions, your motivations are pure, and it works for you and your child without physical harm involved, then you have succeeded at one of the most difficult jobs a human can have (which I am very much looking forward to), and that is to raise child.