My Beef About Other Peoples Beef

If I have one major complaint about the whole pregnancy experience, it would have to be other people voicing their opinions about how I should be caring for myself. For example, I have not given up coffee. I still drink about a half a cup or so a day and feel totally fine about doing so. I often times go for coffee with a friend at work. On one occasion, while coming up the escalator to the elevator towers, another person I work with saw me with a coffee in hand and exclaimed, “That better not be a coffee!” But of course it’s a coffee! The cup says Starbucks on it. I didn’t order juice to go in a coffee cup! The next day, would you believe she brought me a book on what is and isn’t safe during pregnancy. I was dumbfounded, but smiled and graciously accepted her gift, thanking her for thinking of me and assured her how useful such a book would be. Try as I may and try as I might, I couldn’t help but feel slighted by her actions. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt that she was being nice, but the circumstances around the situation left me somewhat bitter. Same thing a few days later. Heading off for coffee with my friend from work and someone else says “You’re not REALLY going for coffee are you”. In the back of my mind I’m thinking, no…I just said that for shits and giggles, I’m really thinking about joining the circus! I bit my tongue, put on my happy clam suite, smiled and said, but of course I’m going for coffee. The response I received was “Well…I’m not your mother, I can’t tell you what to do”. How can I walk away not feeling frustrated by other people trying to tell me how I should care for my body or rudely assuming what I am doing is going to harm my baby. I consider myself to be quite intelligent and resourceful. OF COURSE I look into these things. Everything action I take now that I am pregnant goes through a grueling process of understanding the risks (if any). I’m constantly online researching everything about safety during pregnancy. I have a ton of resources at my fingertips (books, Telehealth Ontario, motherisk, OB, family doc, and the billion pregnancy resources online). I’m sure everyone means well, and I do take that to heart. But for Pete’s Sake, try and remember that what you are expressing is an opinion. Everyone has one, and there is usually more than one right answer. There! I think that’s it. I feel better now that I have vented. And that was just about coffee! Oh, and by the way, the book that woman gave me said coffee (less than 2 cups a day) was totally safe!